May 2026

I don't even know how to go about recording what happened in May this year. Some of the biggest regular life events happened in May and there was so much going on all at the same time as a nightmare unfolded with my dad being diagnosed with CJD and passing away on May 21. I will change the publish date for this post so that it is categorized as done in May, but it is currently October, 2026. It has been such a difficult 4-5 months and I have considered just skipping over the month of May, but I know it will help me continue through the grieving process if I try to finally record it here. I think I will just go in chronological order as that is how the month went and it will best represent what my experience was during this time. Part of the hardship was having to bounce back and forth between the agonizing experiences of losing my dad to all the other things that happened this month. 

May 1 began with me coming home from the ER visit/hospital admittance for my dad at about 3:30 AM. Luckily it was a teacher work day at school so no students were there. But, there were some really important meetings about the end of the school year things that I was required to attend. So I dragged myself to school and made it through the meetings. Allison went to the hospital so my Mom could go home and gather some things for what could be a long stay.

I went up to the hospital on Saturday morning, May 2, to be with Mom and Dad for the first part of the day. Dad was all hooked up to wires for the EKG (or EEG I don't remember). He wasn't too happy. 

That night was Prom which I am in charge of as the Student Government advisor. It is always stressful to make sure everything is going as planned. There were a few bumps with no stage for the DJ, which I thought I had requested, but maybe I didn't. Then there were issues with the admin letting some people in from other schools and not letting others in. But, in the end it all worked out and everyone was safe and had a good time. 

Brian went with his friend Liv and Timmy went with his friend Lexie. They both had a great time!

May 3rd was Sunday and I was able to get back up to the hospital. They did have a very nice view from their room. There was a chair by the window I would take while there if I wasn't needed to help. Mandy's kids had left some cute cards on the windowsill.

That week Timmy took the AP Biology Test and Brian took the AP Chemistry Test. They also had state tennis matches. Both Brian and Timmy played in state tennis and some teammates came to watch them. Mark coached as always.

Things were starting to get really hard as doctors worked to find out what was wrong with my dad. One neurologist told my mom that she thought my Dad had CJD, but could not confirm until tests came back several weeks later. CJD is a horrible fatal disease and we were all in shock and refused to believe it. The doctors continued to move forward with all kinds of tests while waiting for the blood test for CJD, because there are other diseases that can mimic CJD and they cannot be sure without the blood test results. 

School was busy and hard and the boys had so much going on. Somehow Brian knew I was having a hard time with all of it. He surprised me one day with the most beautiful flowers a few days before Mother's Day because he thought I maybe needed them sooner than later. It really was the sweetest thing and was so needed. I am so grateful for him and his care and thoughtfulness. 

On Thursday, May 8 (Mark's Birthday) we were able to visit Dad as a family before going out to dinner. He was still pretty with it mentally and talked to us and joked and talked to the boys. It was a very special beautiful visit that I am so grateful we had.

Then Mother's Day arrived on Sunday, May 10. Brian and I played a cello duet in Sacrament meeting. We played Consider the Lilies. It was beautiful and special to play with Brian. I also taught a lesson in Relief Society on Elder Kearon's April 2026 talk. 

After church Mark made everyone some delicious pizza.

And then I was able to go spend the evening at the hospital for Mother's Day. Mark and Timmy came by for a little bit. I think Brian had loads of homework. Other family was visiting as well.

On Monday, we had a busy day at school and I had a faculty meeting. Thankfully I was able to get my assistant advisor to take over Student Government for me on Tuesday so that I could go up to the hospital to be with my mom and dad. The physical therapist took dad for a little walk down the hall and then outside to be in the sun for a bit. Now he was starting to not remember as much, but he talked about a few things from when he was growing up out on the patio because we could see the avenues. His long term memory was still really good, but his short term memory was going quickly. It was like super fast moving dementia.

That night Mark hosted the boys tennis team banquet at our house.

After school on Wednesday May 13 the boys and I went up to the hospital again. My dad was declining fast and each day he was sleeping more and more. He slept most of the time we were there, but we waited and he woke up enough to say goodbye to us as we left the hospital room. 

That evening we hosted the Student Government end of year party. We just had dessert which was easy. The SBOs took care of the prizes and it was a very lovely evening.

The kids played CROSSNET outside under the pink clouds.

Earlier in the week I could see the decline my dad was experiencing so quickly, so I called Emily and told her if she wanted to see him while he could still maybe talk to her coherently, then she needed to come from Houston as soon as she could. She was able to arrive on Thursday, May 14. We were all able to be there together on that day. My dad very much enjoyed having us there. He was starting to sleep much more and his memory/comprehension was fading.

That evening I went back to the school for the Cottonwood Community Night event that Student Government needed to help run.

Then the next day, Friday, May 15 we had our final assembly as a Student Government for the 2025-2026 school year. These were Brian's last few weeks of high school and we had so much happening. I tried to just do my best to do all the stuff at the same time as spend all the time possible with my dad and help my mom at the hospital. I look back now and see that it certainly wasn't done perfectly, but I had so much help from Heavenly Father and others around me.

Right after the assembly I got a text from my mom with the confirmation that my dad had CJD. It was final. No more hope of it being something else that could be cured. He was going to die. The doctors were saying he maybe had a few months to live. I choked back the heartache and tears as I finished taking care of things at school that day. It was such a hard afternoon. Things had not gone as well as we had hoped in the assembly. The photos in the end of year Historian's video only reflected a small portion of the student body (I was just not able to preview it and have the SBO Historian redo it). There were groups at the school that were very disappointed and I had to listen to complaints from other teachers and I had to express apologies all while hurting so very badly inside about my dad. It was really hard for me. I wish I would have told someone what was going on and just left to take care of myself. I finally made it home to crawl into bed and let the tears flow.

On Saturday and Sunday I was able to spend much of my time at the hospital. Sunday I brought a little speaker and played some nice sacred music for my mom as my dad slept. She was the Relief Society President during this hard time. Allison and Mandy did so much to take care of all the things she needed in Oakley so that she could be with my dad. It was such a difficult, traumatic and exhausting time. She dozed off while I was there that Sunday as she held my dad's hand. I love them both so much and my heart breaks seeing this picture again.

Brian had decided last minute that he wanted professional senior/mission photos. We could not get a photographer in so little time to get them done, so Mark took him up the canyon while I was at the hospital that day and took the pictures with his phone. He did an amazing job! Brian was thankfully very pleased. These are just a few of the many great photos Mark took.

I am so grateful for Mark and his willingness to help Brian in so many ways during this time.  We were able to put together a great graduation and mission announcement for Brian with the photos.

That same Sunday evening Brian graduated from Seminary.

I will miss these kids!

The next night was Senior Awards night! Brian got a lot of awards! I am very proud of his hard work throughout high school and all he accomplished!

He also received the very prestigious Golden Horseshoe award! His name will forever be up on the wall at the school along with the other Hsiaos that went to Cottonwood.

Now that my Dad's diagnosis was confirmed as CJD and we knew it was terminal, the hospital said he could no longer stay there. The doctors thought he had weeks and maybe months to live. We wanted to get him moved to the ranch, but it wasn't ready yet, so we had him transported to a place in Bountiful while arrangements could be made to get hospice and have him transported to Oakley. On Tuesday, May 19, Allison, Mandy and Melanie were able to help with settling him in the Bountiful location while I took care of things for school, took Timmy to the orthopedist for his broken knee at Primary Children's, and helped prepare our home and food for Mark to host the executives that were in town from his company. Mark's work group had a very nice time at our house and it was a successful event that evening.

The next day was Wednesday, May 20. After teaching at school I went up to Bountiful to be with Dad. I spent time with him and my mom and Melanie. It was quiet for most of the time there. A few days earlier one of Dad's best friends and fellow humanitarians, Duane Gines, passed away suddenly (brain hemorrhage) while hiking the Timpanogos trail. We were all so shocked and saddened by the news. Duane's daughter Kristy came to visit Dad that afternoon. She talked of Duane's love for Dad and all their adventures together in Peru, Bolivia, Mexico, India and Nepal and we smiled at the thought of Duane preparing a welcoming party for Dad in the Spirit World. The picture below is of Dad and Duane in India, probably accepting some gift for the work they were doing there. It is so sad for us to not have these two great men here on earth and so strange to think that they both died within such a short time from the other. I am grateful for Kristy's visit that day. Dad was not really coherent and maybe did not recognize her, but Duane was ready to see him and waiting for him I am sure of it. 

Kirsty and Melanie left and I stayed later into that Wednesday evening with my mom. Dad was not responding much by this point. Mostly just sleeping. He would drink a bit when he was awake even though it would make him cough. He was often agitated even in his sleep and would groan with discomfort. The decline was moving faster than expected. We were trying to get him on hospice and decided to move him to the ranch for the last days of his life. We still thought it could be weeks away. 

The evening got late and it was time for me to go home. I was able to rouse Dad enough for him to look at me. He smiled. I gave him a hug and a kiss and told him that I was leaving for the night and that I loved him so much. He looked me in the eyes and said in a quiet rattly whisper, "I love you." That moment will be etched in my heart forever. It is a special tender mercy that I know was given to me by a loving Heavenly Father. A moment He knew that I would need to carry me through the painful and trying times ahead in this mortal life. My Heavenly Father loves me. My earthly father loves me. I am a daughter of God and I was given the privilege to also be an Evans daughter. The daughter of Tim Evans.

The next day was Thursday, May 21. I had to be at school for class and several meetings and to prepare for the Senior Dance I was in charge of and Brian had committed to DJ at that night. I was able to finish up at school and head up to Bountiful for just a few short hours before the Senior Dance. When I got there Aunt Ann and Uncle Richard were there and so were Melanie and Mandy. Dad was not doing well. He seemed to be in pain and would yell out with unintelligible words with what strangled voice he had left. We worked with the nurses to get him pain medication, but there was not much available as he was not on hospice yet. He could not be on hospice in that location with the insurance. We had arranged with a hospice company to have him moved to the ranch the next morning. My mom was at the ranch helping to prepare a space for him and would be coming back in the next few hours. Ann, Richard, Melanie and Mandy all had to leave for different reasons. I was left alone with Dad. He would settle for a little bit and then struggle again. He was miserable and I felt so helpless. I sat next to him and held his hand and talked to him and prayed over and over as tears flowed down my face. Mandy's husband, Brian Porter, was on his way after work to be there when I had to leave and while my mom was on her way back from the ranch. I said my goodbyes to dad and switched Brian out as he arrived. I was glad Dad was not alone. I expected to come the next day to help with the move up to the ranch.

I drove to Wheeler Farm where we were having the Senior Dance. Mark took care of all the DJ stuff with Brian and Timmy and they started setting up. I helped my senior class officers to set up everything else and get ready to start taking tickets as students arrived. About an hour after leaving Bountiful, Brian Porter called Mark and told him that my dad had passed. Mark told the boys and came and took me aside to let me know. I left the dance and found a large out of the way tree at the farm to sit under and cry. At first I wished I would have stayed with Dad and not left him for the dance, but then I felt a calm and a peace about how it happened. I had the thought that he waited for that time when neither my mom or any of his daughters were there. My mom had the same thought. I am grateful Brian Porter had the impression he needed to go when he did so that my dad was not alone. My mom arrived a short time after his passing to say her goodbyes and help take care of things with the funeral home. Melanie went to be with her and Brian Porter was super helpful in all things.

Mark and my Brian were the DJs at this Senior Dance. There was nothing I could do to help in Bountiful so I stayed to help Brian and Timmy get through the night. The word had spread and we got a lot of hugs and sympathies, which I am grateful for. We went on with trying to enjoy the dance and make it a decent night for the seniors. 

That night at home and the next day was full of tears and grief and shock. Saturday morning I went with Brian to his Academy of Finance graduation. This was the start of the graduation events for Brian. It was hard for him to celebrate these big milestone events so close to his grandpa's passing.

That afternoon we went to Braza Grill for one of his graduation dinners.

Sunday May 24 I woke up to this beautiful sunrise right outside my window. I felt a peace and gratitude in the midst of the deep sadness at losing my dad. 

Brian had to give a talk in another ward in the stake that day. I went to listen to him. He gave such a beautiful talk and people still bring it up when they see me all these months later. Heavenly Father was pouring blessings upon us. Mark and I wanted to bring dinner up to the ranch for all my family. Everyone felt that it would be good to be together so Mark and I provided all the food and it was good to have everyone together for my mom. We started helping her plan everything that needed to happen next and we began looking through pictures and creating a memory album for Dad. The sunset at the ranch was just as beautiful as the sunrise at home that morning. Dad loved the sunsets at the ranch just like I do. I like to think he had a part in sending it to me.

Memorial Day was the next day and I think I helped my mom with things and then we had to pick up flags. 

Then it was the last couple of days at school. It was not an easy time for me. There was so much to do but my spirit and body could just not really work properly. I kind of moved through what had to be done in a fog and tried my best to be there for Brian and Timmy. Here is the last day ever at school with this kiddo. We were getting yearbooks signed.

My 40 Student Government officers for next year had to prepare their dance for the leadership camp happening at Utah State University the next week. The end of the year is really not the end of the year as a Student Government Advisor until that camp is over.

Family and friends gave us flowers and their sympathies.

I took some time to help my mom order a memorial stone for my dad. It had to be done right away if we wanted the possibility of it being installed before winter in Oakley. Otherwise it would be almost a whole year before it could be installed. We found a good company to purchase one and my mom picked a beautiful stone.

I spent time trying to find a photo of him for the main display at the funeral. He didn't have portraits taken of him really at all so it was not an easy task. We liked his smile in this picture, but the background needed some fixing.

On May 28, the boys decided to go with the CHOICE Jr Board to serve food to the homeless. I'm glad they were able to participate. 

Finally, graduation day arrived! It was hard to think that Dad/Grandpa was not there to celebrate. We didn't even ask my mom to come. She had too much that she was dealing with. It ended up being a great ceremony though. Very proud of Brian and all my students! Cottonwood teachers wear robes and sit on the graduation floor with the kids. It was fun to be down there with Brian!

I feel so blessed to be his mom.

Looking back, there were miracles in May that helped me through. Heavenly Father knows me and loves me and blesses me. I am grateful to know of His plan for us. I am grateful to have a loving Savior in Jesus Christ. I am grateful that my dad taught me to rely on Jesus Christ. Because of Him, I know I will be with Dad forever. Oh how I will miss him here on this earth though. It is so hard to say goodbye for now.